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“And I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.”

"You know what? I would have saved the receptionist."

“Nothing stresses me out. Except having to seek the approval of my inferiors.”

"Oh. It was just cookies the whole time, wasn't it...?"

"I feel God in this Chilis tonight!"

"Andy Bernard does not lose contests. He wins them. Or he quits them. Because they're unfair."

"If I had to, I could clean out my desk in five seconds."